NIKKI SIXX - The Heroin Diaries: A Year in the Life of a Shattered Rock Star
A book by Nikki Sixx and Ian Gittins
by Jack Wellington
Excerpt from “Heroin Diaries”:
“…two major things happened to me in ’83… Shout at the Devil went platinum… I crashed my Porsche drunk, dislocated my shoulder and started smoking heroin to numb the pain. The problem was, I carried on smoking—and then started injecting—long after the pain was gone.” —Nikki Sixx
Alcohol, acid, cocaine... they were just affairs. When I met heroin it was true love.
On the night of December 23, 1987, Sixx was declared dead for two minutes after a heroin overdose, only to be revived with two adrenaline shots to the heart by a persistent paramedic who was a Mötley Crüe fan, (this incident was the inspiration for the hit song “Kickstart My Heart”). Sixx estimates he overdosed “about half a dozen times.”
TOMMY LEE: “We all went to that dark fucking place at various times-but Nikki seemed to like it there more than any of us.”
Bassist for the legendary rock band Mötley Crüe, Nikki Sixx shared his most private and gripping details of one of the most unique memoirs of drug addiction ever published in his best-selling book, “The Heroin Diaries: A Year in the Life of a Shattered Rock Star” in ’08. If you haven’t read it – pick up this very true read – a compelling journey through addiction – educate yourself – and more importantly, educate the young around you, who are so tempted to start the “habit”.
Nikki Sixx’s “Heroin Diaries” brings you behind the rock ‘n’ roll dream and into the dark, seedy world of drug addiction. Every turn of the page, you get drawn deeper into Sixx’s own private hell he personally orchestrated at every turn, and a glimpse at the people (the vultures, the parasites) who enabled him down his chosen path of self-destruction, and even to death, over and over... and over again.
Candid accounts of “on-the-road” debauchery are revealed through Sixx’s distorted perspective of the “rock ‘n’ roll” way of life, and then recounted through the eyes of his band mates: Tommy Lee, Vince Neil and Mick Mars. Slash, Rick Nielsen, Bob Rock and ex-managers and ex-lovers also reflect on Sixx’s downward spiral of coke and heroin addiction.
Excerpt from “Heroin Diaries”:
Van Nuys, 4:15 a.m. (1987)
“The best part of freebase is before the first hit. I love that moment, right before I put the glass pipe to my lips...that moment when everything is sane, and the craving, the salivating, the excitement all feel fresh and innocent. It’s like foreplay...the ache that’s always better than the orgasm. Yet as soon as I hit the pipe, within 30 seconds all hell breaks lose in my brain...and I keep on doing it and doing it and doing it and doing it, and I can’t stop. Every day that I sit here and write, it’s always the same. So-why? Why do I do this? I hate it...I hate it so much, but I love it even more. The worst part of freebase is running out. But I have a new jones – speedballs of any kind. The junk just isn’t enough anymore...I feel like I’m only halfway there...”
At first, I found it entertaining, then, page after page, I found myself thinking: ‘Why are you doing this?! Why do you keep repeating the same mistake over and over and over…?!’ I just couldn’t put this book down. All I thought about was my friend, (another victim who fell prey to the seduction of heroin), and how blind I was to what he must have been going through. I’ll never look at people “partying” the same way again. This book had a profound affect on the way that I view the whole “rockstar” way of life, and drug addiction, itself. Though Sixx comes off as a self-centered, arrogant rockstar, his diary really opened my mind to how powerful an addiction can be – whether it’s drugs, gambling, sex – you name it… Addiction can suck you in by seducing you innocently at first, only later to claim your very being, altering your perception of right and wrong—fucking with your every sense of reality.