By Lainie Speiser

I’m a boss on the streets and a servant in the sheets, in other words— the typical sexual submissive.

I’m one of those people that likes to be in charge.  I take on more responsibility than is necessary, I’ve got a lot of opinions, and I’m not afraid to express them.  Some people have had the nerve to call me pushy and aggressive, but what kind of publicist would I be if I were shy, passive, and unassuming?  A homeless one, that’s what.  I love what I do, but admittedly it can get a little stressful.  There’s pressure.  There’s worry, I don’t feel like I can let my guard down, so when I have a hard day all I can do to relax is get on my knees and deliver the best blow job in the world.  Or be thrown over a manly, hairy lap and get spanked hard.  Or get tied up with my tights taken from the hamper and fucked hard from behind.  This is how I unwind. 

I was always like this, but I didn’t put a label on it because labels are limiting and that’s not the way I like to live.  But there’s always been this willingness when it comes to sex, and this desire to please my partner in every way I can and this joy in being servile.  A lot of strong-willed people are like this; you’d be surprised how powerful men really want to get to get into some strap-on sex action.  Not because they are gay, but because it’s the ultimate act of giving up total control.  I know these men exist because I’ve been the open-minded woman who’s said, “Sure that sounds like fun.”  But it wasn’t fun because it takes a lot of stamina to fuck a person, I discovered, and ever since have respected all of the work that men do to make us ladies happy. Also, once you open that door with a man— once he gets a taste for anal play— nothing else will do, and as I’ve said, I don’t enjoy labels.

Before you stop reading this because I’ve disgusted and offended your male sensibilities, this column isn’t about strap-on in the butt sex; it’s about me being a submissive and the good and the bad types of dominant men I’ve sampled before I decided all I wanted was a Daddy aka my husband.

It was a typical Saturday early afternoon, and my husband and I love brunch at the bar, but as we got closer to the only two empty seats left, I saw one of my former Domme lovers whom I call, “The Face Stepper” sitting there with his arm around his date with a firm fistful of her straight, brown hair.  “I don’t want to sit here. Let’s go get a table,” I said to David, grabbing his hand and leading him to the hostess station. “There’s a guy I used to know there, and he’s a total creep.” David, like most men who are in love with the wife, didn’t want to know anymore and we were lead to a table where he could still watch the hockey game.

When you’re a single submissive woman who loves sex, knows what she likes and isn’t afraid to get it, you sometimes meet some interesting people.  The Face Stepper was one of these, and I call him The Face Stepper because the last time we were 

together he came on my face, then stood over me on the bed, lifted his size 12

bare foot, and rubbed his spunk into my face with it. I’m not that kind of submissive.  I know some women and men like it when they get their face stepped on, but not me.  I don’t take things that literally. 

You see the one annoyance with dealing with men who enjoy dominating is some of them do not know when to stop.  Every time me and The Face Stepper went out for a drink or to grab a bite to eat, he couldn’t leave what we did two hours ago, on my living room floor behind.  I’m an old-fashioned lady.  What happens behind closed doors stays there for me— it’s not my entire way of life.  Just because I enjoy getting fish-hooked (this means having your mouth roughly held open my two fingers in the corner of your mouth) when getting fucked it doesn’t mean you should pull my hands behind my back while we are at a party.  It’s common sense, to me, but I guess some people need to be told what is inappropriate behavior outside of sex sessions.  I remember once someone at a restaurant, a bartender, complimenting my long hair.  The Face Stepper responded with, “Yes all of this hair makes for great handles,” he said taking a fistful on each side.  It was awkward for everyone around us but him. 

Prior to the face-stepping, this guy— an attractive, older, gentlemen who does good deeds as a public defender— was enjoying dominating me.  He enjoyed pontificating while tying me up. “You’re going to learn so much about yourself,” he said.  “You’re going to learn a lot about yourself because of me.”  I’ve never taken well to this kind of pretentious talk; it’s not sexy to me because it sounds like a lecture.  I’d rather be told I’m going to be fucked so hard your cum is going to pour out of my ears.  “Oh yeah?” I said and started laughing.  “Because I just thought you need to learn a lot more about yourself from ME!”  The laughing made him angry; I wasn’t playing along with this fantasy of the wise man breaking down the wise ass publicist.  He roughly got off me and stood in front of the bed.  “LISTEN! THIS ISN’T A JOKE! IF YOU CAN’T SHUT THE FUCK UP THEN LEAVE!”  Which made me want to laugh even harder because it’s hard to keep a serious face when you’re tied up and being yelled at by a man over 50 wearing purple bikini underpants.  “I’M SERIOUS! I’M BEING SERIOUS!  THIS IS SERIOUS TO ME!”  So, I gave him my safe word, “peanut butter” and he untied me, and I left, following orders like a good submissive should. 

Later at home, I thought maybe he wasn’t being serious.  What if this was part of the whole scene?  Yelling at me like a schoolmaster at a pupil who was passing notes and not paying attention.  As annoying as he could be, it’s also not the easiest thing, to find a man who is comfortable dominating a woman, especially in this politicall correct world we live in.  Then on second thought, it is easy to find a man who enjoys being dominant but what’s not easy is to find a man who does it right.  The men who do it best are the men who are completely secure in their masculinity and sexuality and enjoy giving and pushing their partner’s limits.  Being dominant isn’t about being angry at all: it’s about being nurturing, even paternal.  That’s why I call my husband my Daddy.  That, and his name is David and I’ve dated about five men before him named David, and I’d rather not recall any of them that often, especially The Face Stepper.




She and Me and the Language Barrier Make Three

This is a guide to the sometimes subtle (and not so subtle)differences of interpretation to sex and relationships in men and women.  At times, it is a wonder that men and women can communicate at all.  I mean, we see things differently for one, and that’s a proven fact, but we also are coming from an entirely different set of vocabulary definitions and rules.  It would appear that the only way we are ever going to completely understand each other is to create a gender translation dictionary.  Let the love and understanding begin.


Men:  An intense sexual craving that generally begins at the onset of adolescence.

Women:  A moderate to intense craving for sexual intimacy, which begins during the exchange of wedding vows and ends by the conclusion of the reception.


Men:  The boss of the house.

Women:  Provides a house for the boss.


Men:  How come life rhymes with wife when death seems to be the only escape?

Women:  She who stands by her husband through all the trials and tribulations he must face.



Men:  Two and a half hours, depending on whether there is overtime or not.

Women:  Another hour and a half.


Men:  That ought to be enough foreplay.

Women:   Wham Bam he just gets it in.  The next thing I hear is  “Damn!”


Men:  Morning, noon, and night.

Women:  Birthday and anniversary.


Men:  If a man screws a woman in the middle of a forest with nobody else around to see other than a camcorder, three friends, and a chipmunk;  did it still happen?  Most men seriously question the validity of such a possibility.

Women:  Man screws strange woman, therefore he is a cheater! 



Men:  The world’s smallest and most expensive handcuff;  usually followed by a ball, a chain, and an Elvis preacher to weld it all together.

Women:  A certified diamond of exceptional color, clarity, karat, and bragging rights.



Men:  “You”  need to talk.

Women:  Silly man, shut up and listen.  It’s time for your pussy whipping.


Men:  The enemy who destroys his piece of mind by giving him a piece of her own.

Women:  The person I must try to impress, befriend, and respect.



Men:  Thought-provoked stricken fear of the most grimace proportions!

Women:  Excitement which denotes decades of advanced thought for this one pivotal moment that will set forth the motions of the rest of her life.


Men:  A  “wife or death”  situation where the man must choose between an instantaneous death by the father inlaw or slow painful one by the daughter.

Women:  A life form on the way, which unfortunately does not give enough time to properly plan the big day.


Men:  Can I secure you to the bedpost without the usual loose bowtie?

Women:  Get married!


Men:  A truth that can only become a lie if it is proved beyond a shadow of a doubt not to be true, at which point it shall then become no longer remembered.

Women:  A complete and utter untruth that shall never be forgiven for as long as the guilty offender continues to fog a mirror.


Men:  Me and you and a blonde named Fondue.

Women:  You and me and a baby make three.


Men:  An amiable agreement whereby both parties unanimously decide just to 

let the woman have her way.  If mama’s not happy…

Women:  A beautifully negotiated discussion of dreams, needs, and passions that is followed by an equally prosperous agreement between both parties.


Men:  Okay, enough is enough;  let’s get on with some make-up sex!

Women:  But you’re about to be sorrier.



Men:  Repeat everything the guy in the funny hat just said.

Women:  Thirty seconds of the most intense vocalization of life and love 

between two lovers, matched by only that of the poetic conversations 

between Romeo and Juliet.


Men:  Ugly day?  Honey, if you hear these words out of me, I must be as gay as Lance Bass and a green tutu on Saint Patty’s Day!

Women:  Please shower me with compliments;  I’m having an ugly day.


Men:  Nine inches of fury.

Women:  Three inches—over in a hurry.


Men:  I have no idea what you just said, and I actually don’t care all that much.

Women:  Yes.

Looking over these differences at a glance, I have to wonder to myself if perhaps we are not that different after all—then I removed my rose-colored glasses and put on my prescriptions.  Men can easily evade much of these difficulties by nodding and saying,  “Yes,”  for most of their responses.  This will inevitably lead to a stand-down every so often when the woman realizes that you were not listening, but this can also be easily negotiated with another properly timed,  “Yes,”  and a well-placed nod—And so the world turns;  one misunderstood statement and calculated cover-up at a time!  



The new Mercedes-Maybach S 650 Cabriolet

The ultimate in open-air exclusivity

The first cabriolet from the Mercedes-Maybach brand celebrated its debut at the Los Angeles Auto Show last December and hits the market this spring– limited to 300 examples and with a net price tag of $323,000.  The high-end appointments in the interior make up part of the vehicle’s special characteristics.  Unique features include nine additional color concepts for the interior, the trim – optionally refined with “flowing lines” – plus the hand-finished craftsmanship of the leather seats with perforations in a waterfall-style look.  The drive system requirements are catered for by the 6.0-liter V12 engine with an output of 630 horsepower.

Carbon 6 Jewelry

What started as a Kickstarter project is quickly becoming one of the fastest-growing men’s jewelry and accessory brands.  The founder was inspired to create the line after watching an outdoor show with his wife.  When he stood up to shake off the blanket, they were seated on, his wedding ring fell off his hand and bounced away, never to be seen again.  When he couldn’t find a replacement that met his requirements of being comfortable, durable, safe to wear, good-looking, and meaningful, he decided to make his own.  He used his background in mechanical engineering to design a unique line of men’s jewelry using carbon fiber.


Gold Rush Man Paris Hilton is inspired by the charming and debonair man who epitomizes the old Hollywood glamor couple.  The fragrance evokes a masculine sophistication in any man who wears it, instantly transporting him to a place of chivalry and refined style.  This new eau de toilette combines exotic citrus and sensual spices to create a smooth and irresistable scent that envelops the skin like liquid gold.  $55


It’s been a good year so for the leading men of Moonlight.  The Barry Jenkins film took home best picture, and actor Mahershala Ali won the best supporting actor at the Oscars.  Raf Simons wanted to give them one more source of pride this morning: their own Calvin Klein Underwear campaign.  Shot by photographer Willy Vanderperre— a long time Simons collaborator— Trevante Rhodes, Alex R. Hibbert, Ashton Sanders, and Ali model classic CK briefs and basic tees.  The campaign is called “Revelation.”


0317 striplvstyle mosaic


The new Maserati SUV is based on the Quattroporte and Ghibli architecture, further evolved and refined to meet the expectations of this market segment, in which Maserati will compete for the first time.

The technology applied to every Levante is designed to offer outstanding performance both on- and off-road. Sophisticated suspension—double-wishbone on the front axle and multi-link on the rear, combined with electronically controlled damping, four corner air-springs providing five dynamic ride levels (plus one additional park-position), play an essential role in the car’s handling.

Starting at $75,900



The most alluring, precisely engineered and refined Range Rover ever.

LR-V8 Supercharged 5.0 Liter Gas Engine, Long Wheelbase; with additional rear legroom of 7.3 inches, it delivers greater interior refinement and space enabling passengers to travel in relaxed, uncompromising style. Starting at $199,950



The Bentayga Onyx Edition named “SUV of the Year” in the Robb Report. In high demand since launch, the Bentayga has attracted new customers to the Bentley brand from around the world. The Bentayga offers a true Bentley driving experience and showcases technological innovation, luxury features, and a powerful all-new W12 engine. Starting at $297,400

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